depressed man...

i'm a depressed man...why? cuz my loyal companion...my onli companion ever since dat happened...has juz given up on mi...sigh...MY IPOD!!!! WHy!!! now i'm gonna be so depressed in camp...sob sob...when will my IPOD BE FIXED!!!

on another note...i've been having regular runs at MacRitchie Reservoir...i think i happened to see one of s'pore's best writers/blogger...i think i saw Mr Brown...having a slow jog in the opposite direction...think he realli lost some weight...then came to read abt the suspension of his blog...for his latest post abt the cost of living in s'pore...sigh...poor guy...ain't this a free country with freedom of speech? saded...

"oh my loyal companion ipod...when? ehrn will u be fine again??? sigh..."

the ironies of life...

Ur frenly neighbourhood philosopher Stinko is starting to feel like he is getting back to his best of coming up with "Logical Crap"...he might come up with a series of posts in relation to these "Logical Crap"...which could mean anything...generally...

anyway, today i had to supervise some reservists in training them with a "new" weapon(its a phased-out redundant weapon called the Light Anti_Tank Weapon...aka...LAW)...also dunno why teaching them dat...tells u alot abt the Army...anyway...i found this guy quite familiar...and he found mi quite familiar too...so during one of the breaks, we got to chat alittle...after awhile...we came to realise dat we're both from NYP...i was a student there...he is still a lecturer there...School of IT some more...then for a moment we realised the irony dat juz transcended btwn us...we juz switched roles...coool~

mi posted to my new company le...its Support company...the worst part of my NS life will come in Jan when i go for my 120mm course(another major slimming phase i hope)...other than dat i shld be trying to get under the radar for the rest of my NS life...most of my new bunkmates i have clicked well...juz dunno why fate always like to play with mi...the same grp of guys i detest also same company...damn...u win some...u lose some...

"irony of the day: people walking on the cycling pavement and the cyclists cycling on the padestrian pavement..."

Gain Enlightenment From the Old Man Himself~

No, not the Old Man James, but this guy called Ah Yap whom i got to noe during my short enjoyable stint at the School of Business in NYP...he told mi to wake up...with these 2 links...as he says it makes for a good read...

http://yapster79.blogspot.com/2006/06/why-girls-end-up-with-assholes.html

http://tpcohn.blogspot.com/2005/11/for-robin-who-doesnt-want-to-be-nice.html

go read if u got the time to kill...it does make for interesting read...and i gotta say...these 2 guys realli can write...if onli i can write like those guys...

i was actually bored enough to read my past posts and dug out this piece of treasure...didnt know i was capable of such crap...though onli brings back memories...


"the day it happened
was the day my heart felt light again in years
but slowly and agonisingly
i realised fate plays a cruel game
as reality set in, i finally realised...
i'm not yours to begin with...
the times i've spent
the effort i've given
the worries i have for u
first seems so worth it...
until reality kicks in
and everything goes for naught...
i finally realised...
i'm a nobody...
where do i stand?
when will this end?
will i call u my own?
or will i wither again?
must i play the waiting game?
and stay as the unseen?
til whatever comes to answer my pleas?
i'll still pray for you
and i'll still be there for you
but at the end the day
who am I to you?
i'll spend all my time just to care for you
but alas the decision lies with you..."


its not any masterpiece or wat crap...most likely ppl wld even think of it as real crap...still...even then...i didnt think i could come up with such crap...

"juz as Adrian Mole thinks he's a genius writer and poet...i'm beginning to think i'm cut out to be a vagabond journalist...onli i dun have a degree or diploma in journalism...oh..."

self-abuser

Most of the times i dun realise how much of a shit i get myself into until i get into it itself...give u a veri good example of yest...

this were the sms dat went tru my phone during the preparation juz b4 the SAF Day Parade rehearsal...

Eric:"hey, feel like going out tonite lei"
Stinko:"huh? do wat?"
Eric:"juz come out la, lets go Zouk maybe..."
Stinko:"okie lo..."

then brudder Lim msgs mi...

Lim:"Yo! Tonite we go Liquid Bar watch soccer followed by Wei's place! Steady?"
Stinko:"okie lo..."

then my ex-boss Old Man James msgs mi...

James:Afternoon! we're getting another jersey set, there's a game tomoro as well, tell mi your size and number if you're in...
Stinko:"L,45"

So wat exactly had i got myself into? i had juz agreed to 2 diff outings after my SAF Day Parade, and a soccer match early next morning...oh damn...

becuz the last time round buddy Eric accompanied mi while i was on depression mode...i felt obliged to return the favor...so i turned down brudder Lim and the tempting liquid bar trip ;P

i went into zouk at a considerable peak time of 12am...expecting the dance floor to be pretty crowded...turns out everyone was watching the england-portugal match...i ended up as one of the viewers as well...and becuz i didnt get into the mood, but still drowned myself in the same amt of alcohol...i got myself a bad headache...the hangover was already starting...and it was onli 2 plus am...i retired for the nite by 3.15am and headed home...juz in time too...cuz i ran to the toilet moment i reached home to pay homage to the toilet bowl...

proceeded to Lala Land at 4 am onli to be awakened by a call early in the morning 9 am...

James:"OIE! WHERE ARE YOU???"
Stinko:"Old man~ sorri...still in bed...hangover"*groans*
James:"its ok, take ur time to come down, your jersey's here...the match has started!"

Before i could say another word...our dear fren hanged up the phone...damn...i had to make my way down...but w/o the soccer stuff...i was determinded not to play...good choice too...the scorching sun was a killer...so i simply showed my face and collected my jersey...i'm a real bastard...yes i am...

spent the rest of the day rotting at home...i'm realli a waste to the human community...

"given a choice, had i known...i would've been spending my time taking care of someone who hadn't been feeling well...but then again...i'm not in a position to do so...sigh...take care..."

the world makes u feel even more like crap~

Becuz SAF has a new directive saying dat all MCs have to be endorsed by the camp's Medical Officers, i had to drag my sorry ass out of bed early in the morning to go back camp...but wat happens when i report to the medical center?

Medic:"Can i help u?"
Stinko:"i'm here to endorse my MC"
Medic:"Oh, u can onli endorse your MC from 1400hrs onwards"
Stinko:*stunned "huh? wats the logic?"
Medic:"its stated here in the Medical Center Directives, see!"
*Medic then points at a signboard stating the different timings
Stinko: (-_-") "Doesnt answer the question..."

Mi then proceeded to finding my sergeant get the green light to go home first instead of waiting til 2pm...while doing so...i had to come under the scrutiny of some of my UIP(Unit Induction Program) mates...so i have taken MC not long ago...so i have juz extended my MC this time round...u got prob? haven u f**kers heard there's a serious case of flu epidemic flying around? or r u guys too engrossed with ur PSPs? playing with them all day long as if ur life depended on it??? dun be so f**king shallow to think dat ppl hu fall sick r always "chao geng"...

to make matters worse...i suspect one of those bast**ds hid my latest series of Adrian Mole's Diaries somewhere, maybe they've thrown it away, maybe they've teared it into pieces...or even used its pages to wipe their sorry asses...on a normal day i would have hunted down the culprit...but becuz i was too weak, too lethargic...i didnt give a damn...

now dat i think of it...wat have i ever done to piss these f**kers? i was a stranger to them as much as they were to me when we were all posted to this unit...b4 dat i had no interaction with these guys b4!!! all the more it makes mi wanna crack their balls cut off their di*ks for being such di*kheads...seriously...

"Dun aggravate my temper when i'm sick...do dat and i promise u when i recover...u'll see something from mi which even the bitchiest bitch fit would look like a kid's tantrum...so f**k off~"

I feel like crap~

becuz i slept for less than 8 hrs over the weekend...because i have a weak anti-body system...becuz i heed advice to rest more...i've once again ended p sick again...think this is the first time my fever has been dat bad...b4 panadol was 39 degrees, after panadol...was 38.5...WTF!!! even panadol couldnt bring my fever down...was tossing and turning last nite in bed the whole nite...wonder if my "like to sweet talk masturbating" bunk mate below was cursing mi under his breath...hmmm...

so instead of going for the SAF Day Parade rehearsal...mi played punk and went to see the doc instead...honestly didnt expect much, except to be excused from vigorous activities...but the veri veri veri veri veri kind doc gave mi 2 days MC! shiok! though mi still feeling like crap...imagine i can blackout from juz standing up and having to control my steps becuz of my aching body...ouch...

"Wonder if the heartache had anything to do with mi falling sick dat badly...mind over matter?"

ouch...

while outside with the poly gang of guys earlier on yest(rare outing)...saw something which caused quite a heart piercing pain...ouch...though i'm still alive...i'm wondering why...dun people die of pain?

then when i got home...once again...fate has to play with mi...father's using the com in my room, so i have to rot in the living room first...i switch on the tv and it EXACTLY shows the part where the gal calls the guy a bastard(he deserved it...) and leaves the guy...ouch...damn it man...

then juz b4 all these...i was reading Adrian Mole's Diary and our dear fren's wife juz left him cuz he so happens to be a bastard as well...how cool...sigh...

i'm too emotionally weak to be a guy la...let mi go thailand be a trans...how abt dat???