Early in the morning...purposely went to canteen upstairs to have a look at wat they sell in the morning...realli disappointing...though the coffee was really strong and fresh...perked mi up alittle...

OIC juz talked to mi for 30 mins straight...with her mouth moving non-stop all dat time...she juz put mi in a deeper dilemma than i already am...i was contemplating whether i shld come back to work for her after my attachment...and she juz scared mi further with that 30 mins talk...sigh...as my fellow NCS colleage salted lady said "ur liang xin bu an...mind want to help her...but heart dunwan..."~ its also cuz of my OIC's boss...lets juz call her lady boss(YES! again a woman...), she's even more particular than my OIC...and she's way more ruthless than my OIC...and she doesnt care abt the welfare of her subordinates...compared to her...my OIC seems an angel...its dat bad...sigh...wat to do...wat to do...wat to do...

chances are i wont be coming back le bah...mi poly guys wanna have an overseas trip...and mi wanna take care of mi father at home too(I have to remind myself dat he's older than he looks...), and i wan some time for myself as well...

and in the distant future...i've set myself some targets...

1. never work for a female boss, they realli r more difficult ppl...and unknowingly deflates ur ego all the way down
2. try to be my own boss, at the end of the day...i hate being ordered around...
3. I'll try as hard not to work in an IT company at all, not even if its non-IT related work...ppl here have no life! how to pick up chicks like dat??? (dats a joke)
4. try not to have a 9-5 job sitting in a non-window office...it realli sux...
5. and finally...earn as much filthy money as possible (its filthy...but at least my family need not suffer!)

finished my crapping, thanx for ur time reading...now get back to work!!!

"when at a crossroad in life...and you don't know where to go............ask for directions~ wahahahaha!!! True wat!!~"
Stinko, ever the nonsensical philosopher

oh bother...early in the morn reach office and i see a stack of log entries for data entry...its thicker than the book i juz finished reading (Angels and Demons)...oh bother...

anyway, something interesting happened yest morn...i was in a hurry to get to office from the mrt...reason??? nature called...so i was walking the long journey to my workplace and finally reached...and quite wet...from the perspiration...off to the toilet i went!!! my office uses the same lights as NYP...motion-detected...so i went in with everything quite dark...i had to walk a few metres in b4 the lights came on...didnt realli care as i was urgent.........so i was happily in the toilet 5 mins later...glad i made it in time til...the lights switched off...bloody hell...it was quite dark then...some more in a cubicle...and i juz watched the horror/comedy flick "the eye 10" the day b4...so was it supposed to be horrific or comedic for mi??? fancy getting stuck in a dark toilet...bleah!

"to get a good 3 days MC...look for a clear spot of a wall, take a good few meters back for sprinting...and ram urself against the wall...guarantee plus chop you'll be knocked out and u can wake up in the afternoon to see a doc for a 3 days MC!!!"
Stinko the part-time "eat snake" advisor

WAT??? ITS ALREADY SUNDAY NITE???? AAAHHHHHH!!!!~~~~

sigh...feel bad abt yest...sigh...though i was pissed...at least i didnt throw my temper...good thing too...sigh...my father's condition is not improving...sigh...he's going for an x-ray tomoro...if onli i could take leave and acc him...feel so helpless now...sigh...he's ready 60! and sick!!! how can i be not worried that he has to see the doc alone tomoro???

better go sleep...if not i'll feel like shit again tomoro morning at work...

"temper is the one thing that you cannot get rid of by losing it..."
Dave Buznick of Anger Management

Thank Heavens dat yest was good fri...ended a bad week for mi...but i'm still feeling a little down...afew contributing factors...esp this morn...

wat happen this morn was dat mi father still wasn't feeling well, had to go see another doc...in Bishan...so early in the morn mother woke mi up to drive them. My father, even in his weakened state and lost voice...still managed to order mi around like i juz passed driving yesterday(it happens everytime i drive...), it gets kind of depressing actually...some of my frens are driving around on their own the same month they passed their driving...its either they have their own cars or using their dads' cars...for mi...dat ain't the case...the car's my father's baby...i cant drive the car without him around...when i drive, i have to listen to him saying all the time "brake!!!", "slow down!!!", "dont overtake!!!"...and repeating road instructions 3 to 4 times in the space of a minute...i understand he cares for mi and stuff but...i wonder if any of u has sat in my father's car b4...

its wasted he's not a racer...he luvs to drive on the outermost right lane, even when he has to filter out to an exit on the left 300m away...insists on sticking to the right lane at 80km/h juz cuz there's a speed camera, pissing other cars behind, forcing them to overtake...onli to go 100km/h after passing the camera...again pissing the cars behind not being able to overtake...he luvs to abuse the brake by going so fast and then suddenly stopping juz inches away from the car...likes cursing other drivers for driving the same way he does...its almost like he has a temptation to bang down every car on the road...i may be almost 40 yrs short of my father's driving exp...but i daresay i'm a way safer driver...

juz when i tot my father is the onli one who doesnt trust mi...my mother goes on and say..."sure he can drive there anot??" if aint sure y even bother calling mi to drive u guys? if aint sure y even let mi take up driving? if aint sure y even talk to mi abt cars and stuff??? sigh...

there are other stuff to...but wont write it down due to time constraint...juz damn sad abt this matter...

"it's disheartening to know that its ppl who are close to you that dont trust you... "
Stinko

i have onli slept for 8 hrs in all for the past 2 nites...i feel so dead now...i'm closing my eyes to type this...can u believe it? last nite couldnt realli help anyway...mi father was having quite a high fever...38.8 degree celsius mind u...anybody with that temperature would have felt like shit...anyway, so i was sponging my dad til abt 1 plus b4 finally going to bed...dunno how's he feeling now...hope he's still in LaLa land :) hope I can be in LaLa land...sob sob...

Some of u might noe dat i'm not exactly doing so well for my attachment...wat some of u dunno is how victimised i feel i have become...god i hate this place...why is it mi everytime there's anything to do? why izzit mi who has to be the butt of the joke everytime u crack one(ur jokes r lame anyway...see anyone laughing??)...??? y do i get the bomb for any fault that i didnt commit? ahhh!!! to the bloody feminist OIC of mine...*shows middle finger*


Boss: SEAN!!!
stinko: yes boss? (walks over)
Boss: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAHZ! understand?
stinko: Yes boss, mi will do it...(walks back to his seat)
-----2 mins later-----
Boss: SEAN!!!
stinko: yes...boss? (walks over)
Boss: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAHZ!~
stinko: er....but...
Boss: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAHZZZ!!!~
stinko: okok, mi go do...(drags his feet back to his seat)
-----another 5 mins later-----
Boss: SEAN!!!!!
stinko: ( -_-") yar...? (crawls over...)
Boss: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAHZZZ!~~
stinko: *sighs* kkz...will do...(pulls his own ass back to his seat...)
-----another 5 min later..again!-----
Boss: SEAN!!!
stinko: ah...boss...toilet break, tak boleh tahan! (uses teleporting skill at this point...)

Based on a true story...but as such story goes...there r always twists to it...juz hope such scenarios will not happen too often...

"whenever in doubt...sleep"
Yawning Stinko

Ah...bad day...had to start the day off with my OIC bombing mi for who knows what...its not exactly my shit i created she was bombing mi abt...but i still get the shit from her...damn...beginning to think she's feminist...all the hardest tasks seem to always come to mi...WTF??? oh nvm...another 1 more month and i'am outta here...some more today is fri...can look forward to the weekends...


worker: "boss, where does this pile of shit go to?"
Boss: "the boy sitting over there,"
worker: "wat abt this other pile of crap?"
Boss: "to the same boy sitting over there"
worker: "and this pile of faeces?"
Boss: "to the same boy of course!"


the above dialogue is fictional...though similar to my position...if not exaggerated, hehehe!!!

oh yeah...something suddenly came to mi...rem mi mentioned yest abt having a balance to everything? maybe i shld revise and re-evaluate a little, you see...there is a balance to everything...a duality, 1 dat complements the other, not equal...left and right complement each other, they are not on the same side, rite? Ying and Yang compliment each other, not having the same color scheme...and...heaven and hell are on opposite ends of earth! where's the equality? hence, know the diff between duality and equality...

in fact...it also applies to humans! Men and Women compliment each other by having diff physical forms with diff mentalities...dats why they attract each other, opposites attract! hence, there is no equality in Men and Women, only duality and complimentary...admit it, there will be stuff dat gals will be better at than guys and vice versa! Put dat into ur heads, feminists and sexists out there!

"there are many great ppl in history who are homosexuals, Michelangelo...Da Vinci...Alexandar the Great...Sir Elton John...Sean Koh the Philosopher...OOPS!!!"

Had yesterday off cuz of MC...infact had MC for 2 days! but i'm back at work today...dun wanna feel my OIC's wrath...onli to realise, she's on leave today!!! i could actually go home now...but neh...i think i'll stay...anyway i'm almost as good as free as long as she's not here...

reason i say this is cuz she always seems to call mi all the time...pisses mi off sometimes...esp when she calls mi a few times in succession...maybe i'll leave slightly early today...i dunno...see bah...

anyway, came across this blog called www.limbueytor.com, a self-proclaimed ah beng but has a good command of language...his blogs are entertaining enough to read...serious...saying dat...of course i'll try to make mine more interesting for whoever's reading these too!

i realised dat as a philosopher...i've not talked much philosophy at all!!! haha!!! let mi start u off...

i've been reading "Angels and Demons" & "The Da Vinci Code" by Dan Brown recently...pretty good books...anyway...rem quite sometime back i was preaching abt there being an equality and balance to everything? it so happens that past sects, religious or non-religious...too stood by these principles...there is a duality to everything...left and right, ying and yang, black and white(these 2 are not colors technically if u didnt know), heaven and hell...even matter and antimatter(bet u dunno wats dat!)...whoah!

"It has long been known that the winners of wars and times write the history...so with that...how true is history itself? History is only as accurate as humans write it..."
Read it from somewhere...Angels and Demons i think

this is gonna be quite a long blog...hehe...mi OIC's on leave today, so i'm as good as free today! SONG BOH!!!! dats y u can seem mi blogging rite now!

Had a veri busy weekend...veri veri busy weekend...saturday...Emily early bday celebration...went to Sentosa...pretty eventful...in a summary...
1.Derrick had his virgin ride on the cable car...
2.we all still suck at volleyball...we still prefer soccer...
3.we all ended up tanned(even if slightly...)
4.Sim Lim tried to be monkey boy with the coconut tree...ended up with spetacular fall and an abrasion wound to this arm...
5.Cong also tried a monkey(or in his case, gorilla!) stance, smart enough not to go too high...
6.Cong ended up a fatherly figure for a chick fallen off its nest(from the same coconut tree...) frightened chick ends up shitting on his fatherly figure's hand(WAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!)
7.Yuan Da and Zhixuan had a sand burial...Yuan Da twice!
8.PastaMania still serves good pasta!

i think dat was abt it...hmmm...hope i didnt mis anything out...as for Sun...spent 4 hrs at the IT Fair...and mi had no chance of sitting down for a rest for dat 4 hrs...hey...not that i liked dat place a lot dats y i stayed 4 hrs...it was cuz of the crowd...moving juz a hundred meters took 10 mins instead of the usual 1 min...god...Rick, Crys and Cong were there too...acc Cong to buy his wireless router...bought myself a new monitor, dvd-writer and a game, battle for middle earth...nice game...need to be good at multi-tasking to play dat game though...

supposed to go for NAFA later...but i'm still feeling sore all over...wats more, my ankle was supposed to be recovering...i think overexerted it on sat and sun...agravated the ankle...now the tendons are more prone to slipping...everytime they slip they hurt...OUCH! think gonna leave at 3.30pm and gonna see a doc...i feel like a piece of dead fish rite now...even the skin on my face feel like its gona crack and fall off anytime soon...

well ppl...hope i didnt take up too much of ur time with this blog of mine...but mi gonna end it off with an excerpt from the novel, Angels and Demons by Dan Brown...cya ppl!

"Whether or not you belive in God, you must belive this. When we as a species abandon our trust in the power greater than us, we abandon our sense of accountability. Faith...all faiths...are admonitions that there is something we cannot understand, something to which we are accountable...With faith we are accountable to each other, to ourselves, and to a higer truth. Religion is flawed, but only because man is flawed. If the outside world see this church as i do...looking beyond the ritual of these walls...they would see a modern miracle...a brotherhood of imperfect, simple souls wanting only to be a voice of compassion in a world spinning out of control"
Camerlengo Ventresca of the Vatican City

its friday again :) how nice...gonna have a busy weekend though...

first i gotta go get Emily's pressie later after work, at Bugis...

tomoro morning its gonna be a movie outing with the family b4 going to Emily's bday gathering at Sentosa...seriously, i dunno wats the plan at Sentosa...hmmmm...

Sun...intended to stay at home rest after Sat's schedule...cant...have to go get a Doc's Letter certifying mi not fit for NAFA...my ankle is not 100% yet...never will be infact...leg is still alittle on the swollen side despite all these time...sigh...

followed by dat most likely gonna make a trip down to Suntec for the IT Show...need a new monitor...the current one is old but has served the Koh Family well for the past 6 years or so le bah, hehe...

there are currently quite a few dilemmas in my mind rite now...1 of them being abt this attachment job of mine...sigh...i'm always looking forward to the end of this thingie...but seems like my OIC is interested in hiring us back as contract or part-time staff...reason is cuz she is short of manpower...of course pay will be better and all but how much i got no idea...its like i understand my OIC's situation and wish to stay and help...but its been awhile since i had a holiday...it'll also have to depend on when i'm enlisted for NS...sob sob...reaching the crossroads of life le...


"i wanna go back to the times when i was always the first to wake up in the family and will remember by heart the cartoons programmes from monday to sunday..."
Stinko, the philosopher who doesnt want to grow up...

hmmm...its the weekend...i'm supposed to be happy...but i'm not...in fact i'm feeling pretty down rite now...ever heard of a philosopher going into poems?




the day it happened
was the day my heart felt light again in years
but slowly and agonisingly
i realised fate plays a cruel game
as reality set in, i finally realised...
i'm not yours to begin with...
the times i've spent
the effort i've given
the worries i have for u
first seems so worth it...
until reality kicks in
and everything goes for naught...
i finally realised...
i'm a nobody...
where do i stand?
when will this end?
will i call u my own?
or will i wither again?
must i play the waiting game?
and stay as the unseen?
til whatever comes to answer my pleas?
i'll still pray for you
and i'll still be there for you
but at the end the day
who am I to you?
i'll spend all my time just to care for you
but alas the decision lies with you...



juz hope to at least noe wats going on and where it'll go...sorri i if i sounded to abstract or illogical...juz wanna at least see wats the future...dun feel pressurized or anything...

Anyway!!!! back to sat...believe i'm gonna rot myself at home b4 going for a bbq in pasir ris...one of my classmate's bday bbq :)

off to sleep le...dun expect to wake up b4 10am...time to enjoy my sleep :)

the beauty of the human life is that because its so short everything seems beautiful and precious
Elves of Middle-Earth, envying mortals

hmmm...another 1 and a half more hrs to friday...this week somehow seems to past faster...no idea why too...sigh...quite abit of stuff happened this week, though i cant rem most of them...try to recall some of them...hmmm...

oh yeah...my right foot is getting from bad to worse...chased after the bus on monday...now end up my ankle will feel funny and a funny sound can be heard if i turn it at certain angles...still seriously hope this wasted foot of mine can recover in time for NS...

gonna go for a piano ensemble tomoro, after work...hope dun need to OT...if not i'll realli be cursing my way to the weekends...had to OT on wed til 9...missd my chance for a good dinner...today OT too, though onli til 7...seriously speaking...i dun mind OT...but it always has to happen when i have an appointment after work...Divine Intervention? ( -_-")

gotta pity my OIC though...she's realli having a hard time now...so busy she cant stop by and chat once in a while...muz tell myself to give her a treat once IPP is over...though i'm complaining abt OT and stuff, she's realli treating mi and the others on IPP veri well!!! maybe treat her to one of the few makan places she mentioned b4...

gotta go sleep le...if not wont wake up in time for work...hehe...cya ppl!

practice supposedly makes perfect...but then again...nothing is perfect! so if nothing is perfect...wats the use of practicing? haha...go figure!
ur frenly neighbourhood philosopher, Stinko