maybe i deserve a wake up call...but wat TC Tan (tok cock tan) gave mi was way more than dat...like a discrimination...it was quite clear he was biased against mi...its not as if i was the one who stole his car number plate (rite now i wish i was)...dun let mi see his car around...serious...

"what's the prob with you? i didint even step on your toe!!! no wonder you're still an impot*nt bachelor..."
a pretty pissed off stinko

i'm gonna be quite philosophical today...

happened iz dat mi eldest uncle came over to my place to help fix up a shelf in the utiliy area...after dat...the same thing happned...the chat btwn be father and him...once again...learnt quite abit of stuff...and once again...its pretty sad...

my uncle and father were the least favored of the 7 children...i think there was another 1 or 2 more children...but they were given away...mi father nearly became one of those given away...maybe its becuz of how my grandparents treated my uncle and father that they turned out to be this way...my uncle actually holds a grudge with his parents...til this day...but...thing comforting thing is...he still does wat he has to as a son...as for my father...i'm surprised how well he coped with dat fact abt being almost given away...for all i noe...he certainly holds no grudge...and is as filial a son can get...sigh...

i cant blame my uncle for bearing this grudge...being treated the way he was as a kid...but at the end of the day, its up to him of how he wants to think and do...in his case...he holds the grudge...for mi father...he juz tells mi..."true that my parents have not treated mi in the best way...but in the end...you onli have 1 father...why hate him?" i agree with mi father...

it is after this conversation btwn them dat makes mi all the more determined to be as a filial a son can get...i want to make sure my father lives well and not worry abt anything for the rest of his life...sigh...i believe in karma...so for wat ever mi father sacrificed for his parents...i'll do more than dat!

"At the end of the day...you choose wether you wanna be a good guy...or a bad guy...regardless of whether wat you went through in the past..."

Next week...quite a big week, got a CRM test coming up, got a UI demo to show, got a driving lesson under assesment, wat else...nothing i hope...mi felt guilty today during the meet up with Mdm Tay...anyone in the class can easily see dat i'm hardly putting in any effort in contributing to the team...sigh...felt realli guilty juz now...mi realli a burden to any team...sigh...finally got my spoilt wireless router replaced, bought it from the IT fair...BUT...my rooms PC has to break down...i think its the casing's power switch prob...the motherboard light is still on...so it cant be the power supply...have to bring it down to the PC shop tomoro...have to fix it ASAP...sigh...so many probs...still gotta control this temper of mine...

"To live a happier life...be more forgiving...but...but...but...some things u juz dun forgive...and a leopard never changes its spots..."

My temper has been flaring very frequently these few days...its a bad thing...i noe...i dunno wat has happened...mi temper's getting shorter by the day...i tot my temper was improving...now its like dat...it juz takes 1 thing at the start of the day to spoil the next 24 hrs...sigh...i dunno wat to do or think anymore...i think its time i go see my diary...its been a long time since i last wrote in my diary...sigh...

"i realli hate myself..."

its seems like this period is the devil's playtime...many people seem to be having problems...serious problems...sigh...to the ppl out there...i pray for you to have peace within yourselves...this way, the problems would be so much easier to solve...sad ah sad ah... see mi frens sad i also sad...

"Serenity starts from the inner peace that's inside everyone of us..."
Stinko, aspiring but foolish philosopher

6th Mar 2004, was a very good day! Although my driving did not improve...the day was good! The bbq was a success! But i have to give credit to the people who orchestrated the event! Thanx alot people! you guys know who you are!!! give urself a pat on the back! And to the people who came for the bbq, thanx for coming and helping in finishing the food(actually there iz quite abit of leftovers!). Too bad everything muz come to an end, and good things always end faster...so sad, school reopen le...more tests and exams le...more sad things le...sigh...so many things, hope these sad things can quickly pass!!! then can enjoy again!!! wahahahahaha!

PS: mi thinking of doing the BBQ again...for mi bday...dunno feasible anot...

"To be happy means to think simple, to think simple means not thinking too far ahead, to not think far ahead means to have no future, to have no future means a hard life, a hard life means to suffer, to suffer means to be unhappy...eh...doesnt equate the first quote..."
Stinko, juz some crap thought

been quite tiring mentally these few days...dun ask why, this holiday hasn't been all dat good...though its a welcome break from sch work, hehe. I think frm now on...i'm gonna see alot of changes, whether for the better for worse i dun noe...but things r gonna change...sigh

anyway, there's gonna be a class gathering, AT MY PLACE!!! cuz mi place here got BBQ pit, so choose my place lor. Mi dun mind realli! its all for the fun of it...though i can almost gaurantee at some point in time i will be showing a black face, happens everytime i organise an event...its my temper...hope not though...but the BBQ's gonna turn out fine!!! Our personal mentor also coming along...unbelievable...believe it!

Come to think of it...i need to clean up my room!!!! ARGH!!!! NIGHT MARE!!!!! gotta have to do dat soon...if not...die...hope and pray everything with go smoothly!!!

"the simplest of action like the flutter of a butterfly's wing can cause a hurricane on the other side of the world..."
The butterfly effect, not by Stinko! wahahaha

hello people, how's life? good i hope...u noe...i come to realise (as always), there can never be peace...well it depends to wat degree of peace u wanna tok abt :) international peace, national peace, racial harmony and peace, civil peace, family peace and finally friends' peace...wahhaha (its crap...i noe)...i'm can sense dat i'm already going through a fog of war...i dunno anything anymore...

LOTR won all its 11 nominations for the Oscar's...nice...deserved too in my opinion...mi sec sch teacher iz gonna lend mi a book on the details of LOTR, talks and elaborates more on Middle Earth...can't wait to get the book~

now having holidays...pretty nice feeling...hehe...partly cuz mi damn slack...however, i hope to be more productive from now on bah...

"Complexity is made up of many simplicities"
a guy with expensive experience, to Stinko(Aspiring but hopeless philosopher)