Mental and Physical Fatigue

The World Cup duties, along with the added workload at work is really taking a toil on this prematurely ageing body...

I've said this for the dunno how many times...i seriously need to lose weight...for more reasons than one...

I seriously am fantasizing about just impulsively travel alone one day..be it to drive into Malaysia and hit Thailand, or buy a ticket to who knows where to see whats next..just as long as I can escape from where I am right now...

It's so tiring that I have got to be other people's support but I can't find my own strength nor from someone else...

I've taken the break up much harder than I thought I would...but I believe its for the better for both parties...I only hope we move on to better our lives from here on out...

Headphone girl recently wrote a very touching piece on FB...perhaps its cuz i miss creative and expressive writing, perhaps its cuz i'm pretty delicate right now..perhaps it was really really that well written...but i teared reading it...

ah wells...

I might just make it a habit of only ever updating this blog once a year.

I miss writing, but every time I do, I find myself whining like a spoilt brat..not good...

I find myself still arguing with anybody...including myself, not good indeed...

I do find the need to motivate myself to work better, and be more responsible..and decisive...

I have been told that I am not the most decisive person in the world, and it can be infuriating to others and even myself at times...

I no longer now have to be responsible not just for my own words and actions, but also those of other people whom I'm supposed to supervise and undertake..its a challenge, which I hope I can take it in my stride and come out a better person from it...

I would think that being a better person, not just for yourself, but also for others, is a never ending duty, task, work, ideal, etc until the day you leave this place...its not easy...but I think anything good never is anyway...

I would like to think that i am a fortunate young man, who has life going for him, if not for his short and hot temper, low metabolism, high appetite, low tolerance for bullshit, and lazy-mindedness (if that's a word)...

So many I's....so self-centred I am...heh

Until the next time :P

Frustrated Male Syndrome

Coincidentally, or perhaps not...its been almost another year since i have been to this place..

been wanting to write out (or in this case..type out) my feelings, mostly frustrations...in hope that it might help relieve a little of the overwhelming negativity which i will not deny i am feeling...

Where should i start?

Work...

i enjoy what i do, which is to interact with people, organise and do things which help reach out to people, help them..and hopefully, make their lives better. Of course, one could say i could do it for a social cause instead of getting paid for it..but hey...i gotta earn a living too...besides, been helping out at a dog shelter now..so i guess i've been hopefully accumulating good karma...

what really irks me at work is perhaps the people i have to work with...

most times, i tell myself that people of all kinds exist everywhere, regardless of where you are...so i only gotta choose to accept it and move on with my life, and let things work out on its on...

but recently...certain events have led me to be burdened not just by others' incompetency but their ignorance and impudence as well. if i gotta work with these kinda people for the foreseeable future...i might really just prematurely have shortened my own lifespan.

a buddy of mine has finally taken the brave step of moving on...a sign of things to come that i should too perhaps..since all the tantrums and fits that i have thrown in an attempt to make a better work place has gone for naught...

i only hope that i can find the strength to protect those that i take responsibility for to not be taken advantage of at work, while skivers and nincompoops do what they do best......be scumbags of the universe...

gonna meditate now...zzz

So it has been almost a year i've visited this place...pretty dead... Some things have changed, some things haven...mostly not to my liking..but thats life...then again...most of it i only have myself to blame.. i only have to learn from these lessons..but the irony is...i never do..heh such is a foolish human.. :P what to do but to carry on life~

grown up matters

I am at an age where my peers are talking about really grown up matters..such as career, housing, cars, marriage, babies...among others...

while many of these topics are not exactly foreign...i still kind of find it surreal that its time that i am, and should be, talking about such stuff..the feeling of being grown up...is kinda scary..

and while some of my frens are happily married, i juz came across one of my frens being proposed...and how sweet it was...and yes...while it was a sweet video, i have to highlight that she was my first ever crush in primary sch...and that was like...14 yrs ago!!! I wish my first ever crush all the best, heh~

work is not much good...with more work coming in before i could give it out...damn..and with my prior stupid action...which i realli realli regret now...i doubt my work will go noticed nor rewarded...i juz hope i dun click the button...

unlucky me

at times i ponder if i tend to be too lucky and unlucky...i tend to appreciate it when situations turn out in my favor, and that seems to happen quite abit..although the same can be said of the opposite...and that...seems to be happening alot alot alot alot alot alot more frequent now...and it has cost mi quite abit...

and with the slump at work productivity and satisfation, along with the recent nitemare that i had (why can't i remember sweet dreams instead?), i only hope things will get better from here on...

oh the irony...

*Boss calls while i'm watching a movie...i hanged up...but msged her instead...

Stinko: in a movie, anything?

Boss: the *&^%$^&*(*&^%$#%^&*()&^%$^&*(&^%$ (a load of gibberish work she told me to do earlier) can already, please do it up by tomorro (which was National Day Holiday)

Boss: anyway what show are you watching?

Stinko:er...Horrible Bosses...